I grew up in a home that was emotionally, verbally, mentally and sometimes physically abusive. Around the age of eight, I began to get sexually abused by my neighbor. The sexual abuse lasted for a few years. Because of the chaos in my house, I didn’t have anyone to go to about the abuse. I began to believe that I had done something to deserve what was happening to me. Shame started creeping in, and I began thinking of myself as disgusting and unworthy of love. At 14 I started using cocaine and smoking marijuana. This began a 16-year drug addiction to cocaine, heroin, and opiates. I experienced the loss of numerous friends due to overdoses and got deeper and deeper into the drug world myself. I stopped caring if I lived or died and didn’t believe I had a future.
I found out about Mercy through my therapist. I decided to apply when I accepted that I was unable to get off drugs on my own. When I first arrived, I was a complete wreck. I still believed that I knew what was best for me, so I fought everything. I fought the staff, I fought other residents, and I fought God. I didn’t want to surrender my control.
A major turning point in my journey happened after I returned from Christmas break, around my three-month mark. At a scheduled program evaluation and check-in, our Program Director challenged me. At first I was angry, but looking back, this is when I finally began to surrender more and more control to God and began trusting the program and the staff.
While at Mercy, God softened my heart towards myself and towards others. I learned the true meaning of forgiveness and the cross. I am not defined by my past, by my failures, or by my sins. I am defined by the victory of Jesus Christ! God showed me what freedom is and how to walk in it. God has restored many relationships with my family. He delivered me from anxiety and depression, as well as many addictions.
After graduating Mercy, I will be returning home. I plan to get a job and go back to college. I hope to start playing the drums again and want to learn to speak Arabic. One day I want to open a Christian coffee house, where the love of Jesus can be shared the way it was shared with me.
I never believed that there was such a thing as freedom, but after going through the program, God showed me what freedom is and how to walk in it with Him. If it wasn’t for the support of donors, I wouldn’t be alive today and filled with the hope that I now have for my future. Thank you for giving this girl another chance at life – life abundantly.