Jessica – 2017 Graduate

My family went to church every Sunday and Wednesday. My parents were leaders in the church, and the church became my second family. As time went on, I felt my church became more and more legalistic. I started to experience a lot of judgment. I started trying harder to be what I thought they wanted me to be, and this is where my perfectionism first took root in my life. I felt like I had to be perfect for my family and to be accepted by both my church and ultimately, God. When I was a freshman in high school we were pushed out of the church. This was my first real experience with abandonment and not feeling good enough. I thought God left me and didn’t want anything to do with me. After this, I entered a four-year abusive relationship and abused drugs regularly. The relationship ended in physical and sexual abuse and a trial where he ended up in jail. I have struggled with drugs, night terrors, and panic attacks ever since.

I learned about Mercy Multiplied through my dad. I had a friend/mentor who helped me apply. When I came into the Mercy home, I was hopeful and ready to get busy and start my healing process.

My biggest turning point during my Mercy journey was during the “Healing Life’s Hurts” study we went through. God showed me His perspective and the things that He was doing in the background that I had no knowledge of. It helped me see my “ex” as a child of God instead of a monster, and it helped me release everything I had been holding onto about the whole relationship.

At Mercy, I found God more real and more present than I ever thought He could be. He showed me His love through the staff and my Mercy sisters. He showed me there was nothing I could do to earn His love and forgiveness. I learned to be still and listen to His voice. I learned to trust people again, and I saw that being myself was all I needed to be. I finally found my acceptance and my identity in God. My relationship with God grew into something I never knew was possible.

I learned all the lies I was believing and how to combat the lies with God’s truth. I learned how important and powerful our words are and what is spoken over a person really affects how they will see themselves and how they will live their lives. In the past, I was living like trash because that’s what I believed I was. I learned how to take back the areas of my life the enemy had been using against me and how to use the power and authority Christ has given me to live free.

After Mercy, I plan on continuing my teaching career. I also want to open a horse ranch for special needs people, abused horses, and abused and delinquent children.

Donors, thank you so much for supporting Mercy! Without your help, I would not have been able to get the healing I needed and to have a free life. You have blessed my life more than I can say! Thank you for everything you do and all the lives that are changed because of what you do.