Jessi – 2012 Graduate

Growing up, I lived all over the country, and my life lacked stability. Physical and emotional abuse and extreme neglect were big parts of my childhood. I started living on my own for periods of time when I was just 11 years old. By the time I was 15, I was living by myself and working 70 hours a week as a groomer at a horse racetrack. I experienced several other things that made my life rough and left me desperate to find help. I witnessed a murder when I was very young. I spent a year living in an unfinished basement that had a bunch of sheep and standing water in it. I was sexually harassed by many different men. I even blamed myself for someone’s death. I grew up believing there was a God, though I believed many things that were not true about Him. Eventually I stopped believing in Him at all.

I discovered Mercy when I ordered a book on Amazon about one of the issues I had. In the reference section at the back of the book there was a small paragraph about Mercy. I looked it up online and applied. I did not really know what the program was about, but I knew I could afford it because it was free! When I first arrived at the home, I was very tired of life and very troubled. I was addicted to self-harm and pornography, and I was anorexic. I was also depressed, struggled with suicidal thoughts, and had an anxiety disorder. I was desperate enough to try anything even if I was a bit skeptical.

While at Mercy I began to overcome temptation and find freedom. A major turning point for me came as I was sitting in the library really dealing with temptation shortly after I had made the commitment to accept Jesus as my Savior. I was really struggling, but I started praying that God would help me. I kept going back and forth in my mind thinking that I would do this certain behavior and then thinking that I would not. Eventually, temptation seemed to subside. It occurred to me while sitting in the same chair that this was the first time since the very beginning stages of my addiction that I had not given in. I just remember being full of joy because it solidified God’s presence and working my life.

I experienced many other practical turning points at Mercy. I truly did not understand how relationships were supposed to work or even how to really take care of myself. I learned a lot everyday about how to just live. Though that helped me tremendously, what meant the most to me was the faith I developed in God. I learned so much about Him. I was hateful toward Him at first but also curious. Every day I saw things and experienced things that made me really consider if He was real. I remember the moment I decided to believe. Even to this day, I can think back to my time at Mercy and remember the first real prayers I prayed and the first answers I received from God. It is something I hold on to no matter what.

Since graduating from Mercy my life has been an incredible journey! I just graduated from a two-year leadership program! I continue to learn more about God and faith every day. God has put many amazing godly people in my life to support and guide me. By the Holy Spirit, I have learned so much about how to serve people and work within the body to advance God’s Kingdom.

When I think of the Mercy supporters, I am grateful. I know the support you give is often a huge sacrifice, but it makes a huge difference! Young girls are coming to know the Lord all the time through Mercy. I am only one example of many! Your support is going to make an eternal difference, and God will bless you for it. I want you to know that words could never really convey the gratitude I have for you and what you have done. With all my heart, thank you!