I was born in Bulgaria to a woman who did not want me. I was taken to an orphanage where there were many orphaned babies like me who did not feel loved. Twenty-eight months went by before a loving family wanted me and adopted me. That was the first time I felt loved. At a young age, I realized that I had a hard time learning and that I did not learn like others. In the fifth grade, I was diagnosed with a learning disability. Because of this I felt stupid and worthless.
I was told by others that I was different, but all I wanted was to fit in. In college, I could not wrap my mind around why the Lord created me this way. The week of my twenty-first birthday I “accidently” told my therapist that I was going to end it all. A few weeks later, my best friend told me about Mercy.
Mercy gave me the perfect opportunity to heal and embrace the woman God created me to be. I was depressed by the circumstances in my life that I could not control. But here, I had the freedom of dropping my heavy bag of depression.
I thought people would like me more if I was perfect. Because if I was perfect, then that meant I was worthy of love from people and the Lord. But perfection is not what The Lord wanted from me. All He wanted was my heart and my obedience. I strived so long for people to see my beauty because I felt ugly, stupid, unseen, unheard, unwanted, and forgotten. I learned that God looks at the heart and I am beautiful because He made me with love and value. I want every woman to know that. I know God is my peace, and the enemy cannot steal my peace that Jesus died for. I know God is Jehovah Rapha, The God who heals. I can now let go of the lies I once believed and renew my mind with truth because I know who God is.
My plan after Mercy is to connect orphaned kids around the world with families. Because of my own story, I want to help other kids find freedom. I want them to feel love and have a place to call home. I know I am loved by God, and He saved me.
To the Mercy donors, thank you for loving me even though you don’t know me.