Jennifer – 2015 Graduate

I grew up in a Christian family and went to Sunday school and church every week. I knew who God was but I didn’t KNOW God. My mom was very depressed most of my childhood and was in and out of inpatient treatment for weeks at a time. During this time I started isolating and became active in sports as a way to escape. When I was 12, I started over exercising and restricting my food intake as a way to gain control over the confusion in my life. During the summer before my sophomore year of high school, my family tried to draw my attention to what my eating disorder was doing to my body. I then began a battle with bulimia. I found my identity in external things, and I defined myself by what I did. I graduated high school and went to college. I believed by leaving I would leave my past in the past. During college the struggles with food went away, but I still continued over exercising as I threw myself into a new passion, rowing. I realized that I couldn’t be an elite athlete and have an eating disorder. After college I found a job and spent much of my free time training. I was determined to learn how to be healthy at a lower weight while still getting stronger and faster in rowing. I got married and moved to pursue rowing in another state. After successes, failures, injuries and extreme weight shifts, I found myself in a state of depression and back down the eating disorder path. I stopped rowing in April 2008 and decided for the first time to get help. I found out quickly that the small problem I thought I had was actually pretty serious. I began ongoing treatment over the next seven years from outpatient, to inpatient, to residential, to partial hospitalization. Treatment became a lifestyle. While in treatment, my eating disorder managed to get worse. My eating disorder groups were often based around issue-related topics, and there was much bonding over “war stories.” The emphasis was on the past, and because the present was focused on merely surviving, there was no room for hoping and dreaming. We were taught ways to self-help but we weren’t taught that what we really needed to do was “die to self.” I became very rebellious, sneaky, manipulative, dishonest, untrusting, irresponsible, prideful and stubborn. A few years later, I found myself seeking after true freedom.

I found out about Mercy through my younger sister who graduated from Mercy in 2011. I applied because I could hear freedom in my sister’s voice, and I wanted to also experience and live in that freedom. I was frustrated when I arrived at Mercy. I did not know how to truly relate to people, apart from my issues.

A major turning point for me at Mercy came when I began working on a portion of the counseling curriculum called “Choosing to Forgive.” I had layers upon layers of unforgiveness. God broke through my walls of hurt, anger, bitterness and resentment and poured over me His grace, love, mercy and peace. I was also able to forgive myself.

While at Mercy God restored and redeemed my life. The more I learned about God, His character and promises, the harder it was to continue to believe the lies in my head. God revealed to me how both my sister and I through the Mercy program have broken generational patterns and have begun planting blessings for generations to come. God also began to do a huge work in my marriage through all I was learning. The expectations and impossible demands I had placed on my marriage I surrendered to God, and He has given me peace and reassurance that the work He has started, He will complete.

Since graduating from Mercy, I have enrolled in Life Coach Training and will be getting my certificate to be a life coach starting in January. I am looking forward to LIVING life for God with my husband. I am excited to see how God is going to use me as I choose and continue to walk in obedience.

To all the Mercy supporters, I want to say thank you so much for financially contributing to the lives of the women that come to Mercy. Without your help I would not have been able to find true freedom from the strongholds in my life. I struggled for 20 years with an eating disorder, and I was unable to find freedom in a typical treatment facility. I am incredibly blessed to have had the opportunity to come to Mercy. My life has been forever changed because of the freedom that I have found in Christ and the tools and skills I was taught during my time in the program. I am forever grateful for the support you generously provide to see young women’s lives changed!