Grief is sneaky.
In early July, I woke up very out of sorts one day. I snapped at my husband, growled through my workday, and was generally not nice to myself or to others. By the third day, I knew something specific was bothering me, but couldn’t figure out what it was. Driving home alone on the verge of tears, I prayed out loud, “Lord, what is wrong with me? Please show me what is going on inside that has me so emotional and cranky!”
Right away I saw a calendar in my mind and realized the day before had been the 15th anniversary of my father’s death. God, in His kindness, brought that to my attention and everything suddenly made sense. I had forgotten but my subconscious knew what day it was, and my emotions were responding.
So, I cried and thought about dad. I remembered funny times, sweet times, hard times. I thanked God for my father, who was a wonderful man. And after giving myself some space to grieve, the weight of sadness I had not been able to identify lifted, and I felt normal again.
Grief in the World
Living in this world can be very difficult. People we love die, or they move away, and we lose connection. Marriages end. Friends grow apart. Children grow up, get married, and move across the country. These are just a few of the losses we grieve.
Sometimes we look forward to something and it doesn’t happen—it could be a big thing like a marriage proposal or something smaller, like getting sick and missing a vacation. Losing something you were anticipating, or counting on, is another kind of loss that must be grieved.
Some things we grieve for a long time, like the death of a parent, or a child. But our society has very little patience with grief. Well-meaning people often say, “You’ll get over it. Time heals all wounds.” And that’s not super helpful when you are mourning a loss, no matter how long it’s been.
We all experience loss. We all grieve. Nobody likes it. And some of us try hard to avoid it. We stuff our emotions in a thousand different ways and distract ourselves with all kinds of diversions. But grief is sneaky, and if we don’t deal with it in a timely fashion, it spills out of us one way or another. Too often, our pent-up emotions get spattered all over those we love most. Sometimes they make us physically ill.
Hope to Hold on to
But here’s the real hope. We have a faithful God who loves us, knows what we are going through, and invites us to talk with Him about everything—including our grief. If you are grieving, pour out your heart to the One who knows you better than anyone. And then listen, because the Lord wants to comfort you in ways only He can.
Remember these truths when you or someone you love is struggling with grief and loss:
God is with you.
“The Lord is near to the brokenhearted and saves the crushed in spirit,” Psalm 34:18
“My flesh and my heart may fail, but God is the strength of my heart and my portion forever.” Psalm 73:26
Jesus understands.
“He was despised and rejected by mankind, a man of suffering, and familiar with pain.” Isaiah 53:3
Peace is available even when we are grieving.
“I have told you these things, so that in me you may have peace. In this world you will have trouble. But take heart! I have overcome the world.” John 16:33
“Peace I leave with you; my peace I give to you…” John 14:27.
Something good can come out of our sorrows.
“He comforts us whenever we suffer. That is why whenever other people suffer, we are able to comfort them by using the same comfort we have received from God.” (2 Corinthians 1:4, GOD’S WORD Translation)
Grief does not last forever.
“Now is your time of grief, but I will see you again and you will rejoice, and no one will take away your joy.” John 16:22
“He will wipe every tear from their eyes. There will be no more death or mourning or crying or pain…” Revelation 21:4
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